I have the memory of a goldfish... I almost forgot who I was talking to!!!
This all happened shabbos morning. Someone said to me we pray toward yerushalayim in the US and the kotel in yerushalayim because it's a holy place and we're drawing energy from this place into us. Between realizing that this has been an "energy bank" for my people for thousands of years (I felt that at the kotel too, like something was flowing into my head and being pulled out of my hands), crying as I connected to prayer as I davened as I had never felt before, and then opening kaplan's book to a section that started to answer all my questions as no one (book or person) had before, the floodgates just opened (along with the waterworks) and I got it.
:)
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